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Take That, Seinfeld!

ROYALWATCHING CENTRAL


Here Is Where You Start. Trust Me. Go There.



Opinionated Site Below.
Be Ye Careful.
I'm Not Like Everybody Else.
Cruise On At Your Own Risk.
If You Don't Like What I Have to Say,
Get Your Own Damn Site. Selah.



Makes no sense to me/Your crazy ways
-- Janet Jackson, "Black Cat"






Thank you, one and all, for some gorgeous skating.

Lobacheva and Averbukh were great. Krylova and Ovsiannikov pushed their edges, and Anissina and Peizerat had a very difficult program.

In the ladies', were there ten gold medals so we could just give them all one? Michelle. Yulia. Anna. Everybody. Even Tonia, for heaven's sake! And silver medals all the way down to Du Yankun. Elegance. Class. Stretch. Line. They were broadcasting in color? Where was Jim McKay?

Enough until next fall. Have fun on Tour!

So closes the skating competitive season. I still don't guarantee I'll be real sane. But at least I won't have that excuse.

Thank you, one and all.



It's My Site And I'll Say What I Want To.


She crashed. So what?

Waaah. Get over it.

We can't. We keep crying. We keep sobbing.

All of us, in ways we may not even notice, are reacting to the death of the Princess of Wales. Why? What has she meant to us? And why are people whom I believe when they say they (consciously) do not care about the royals, or Diana, or anything, acting grief-stricken anyway? Even though they may not know it?

Why?

I hated her guts. Thought she was a flippy little bimbette with no hope of recovery. Then why am I making a memorial page for her? Flowers, chocolates, charity links and all? Wow. Why?

Why is all this happening?

To us. To me. Why?

Why indeed? I've been crying that since she died. Why did a sitting Queen have to bow her head to the casket of a mere Spencer? If we're so grief-stricken and media-conscious in the wake of such a horrible camera-fed death (and I will maintain to the end that it was. For an icon like that, there was no other way than speeding into a tunnel at (however many it was) miles per hour in a rented (well, I thought it was a BMW) with an honor guard of paparazzi on her tail. Live hard, die young, and at least attempt to leave a good-looking corpse. I wonder what her last words were.) why are we still hassling the boys?

I still have this image of a frail, skinny hand reaching out from a hospital bed to grasp the lever of the fabled British press and pull it to a stop. All gears crunching. Final score: Diana 1, Press 0. She must've flipped a bird at them. Sleep? No!

Why did we let our culture collapse to the point where the death of one woman affected us all so badly? What can we do about it? And will we go on? I estimate that that woman took out a skitch over 50% of our modern culture in that car crash. 50%. Half. Plus about half a corgi's tail. (I have this thing about corgis. Don't know why. Expect to find out.)

I understand the royals have very good senses of humor. God, I hope so. Somebody warn them. I don't want William's feelings hurt.

Yes, he is reported to be very active on the Net. Yes, those fingers look capable of operating a mouse. Yes, he has a mind of his own.

I write for my words to be read by Queen Elizabeth II, Prince Charles, and Prince William. There is a good chance that they will stop by, in between emailing each other, feeding the dog, and kicking a soccer ball. (What you guys call football. Further translation may be found here.)

I advise the rest of you to do the same. They're out there. C'mon, if the Queen makes a practice of checking the tabloids every morning to see what's said about her family (and if it isn't true, it should be), yuou know they're checking by here.

As if I'll ever know.

Curtsies, Ma'am, Your Big-Earedness, Your Royal Gorgeousness. Enjoy it.

Further commentary on the royals may be found here.

(All right, William fans, here. Don't drool on the keyboard.)



News and Reference Section

Sometimes you just got to have it all in one place.

Royal news compiled from several Web sources
CNN
the BBC
the London Times
New Music Express
Lots of Other UK Papers (including Private Eye)
International Newspapers
the British Politics Site
The British Monarchy (official site)
This Heinous Royal FAQ (alt.talk.royalty)
Critical Thinking
Weather at Althorp House
Weather in London
British Tourism and Geography
Lots of Cool British Stuff
British History, Etc.
Just Everything on Britain
Currency Converter
A Selection of Dictionaries
Great Shakespeare Site
Cool Chaucer Site
Neat Milton Site
Awesome Douglas Adams Site
Wonderful Anthony Burgess Site
Excellent Anthony Trollope Site
All Kinds of Cool Helpful English Stuff
Highest-traffic reference site in Europe? Ladies and gentlemen, here's Bigfoot!

Gotta love the Mirror! (And right here on Sundays!) It's the ultimate check on British culture: What's going on over there?

Hmmmph -- last time I tried to post some cool Mirror stories as links, they faded within a day or two. Will this happen again? I'll give it another shot at some point, but that was rather unnerving. I like to maintain an archive for my visitors. We'll see...

But ya gotta wonder: Fact, fantasy, or science fiction?

Special emphasis right now: World Cup.

More British culture stuff can be found here.



James Joyce


I love James Joyce. I totally adore James Joyce. Finnegans Wake is one of the greatest works of the last 500 years. Dude. James Joyce had some problems:

  1. Nobody could understand what he said.
  2. They thought his stuff was weird.
  3. He had the tendency to say things that pissed people off.

A few other interesting things about James:

  1. He was Irish.
  2. He wrote about absolutely everything.
  3. He wasn't afraid to say what he thought.

Welcome, James. If you should flit through here in ghost form with maybe an evanescent mousepad or something holding up your phantom mouse, may these words scrolling up on your spirit-form screen not displease you. Good heavens, I've tried my best.

Oh. Another thing about James: He tended to write a hell of a lot.

They can't ban me. This is the Internet.

So here's a present for you, James. The Irish laugh at both life and death. Or is it about life and death?

Another present for you. In case you're thirsty.

And if you really want to know what they're saying.....check here.

Lord, they do talk, don't they?

Four words. Both the beginning and the end of the book.

They sum it all up.

"riverrun, past eve and adam's,"

Dammit, James, I'm still trying!

I've even got a page up for you. See?


And I learned to write from this bitchy Chicago columnist named Mike Royko. He was incorrigible (dictionary is above). He gave as good as he got. You did not, repeat not, mess with him in print.

Other book stuff can be found here.


Clothes. Clothes. Clothes.

For a different look at how clothes affect your fortune, click here.



Music.


What do you mean the music we listen to is not important?

Music stuff goes in here. Don't be surprised to find examples from other disciplines. Everything affects everything else.



Gems and Jewelry.


What do you mean, this section isn't getting any hits? I'm gonna cry unless you click here.



Fuck The Ring of Emotions. I'm Doing My Own.



Me. Love. Hate. A number of other things.....




Southern Culture. Never Mind the Skids. It's On the Concrete Blocks.



Straight from the Jesse Helms State....




Writing.



The Books section is other people's stuff. This is mine.




Spiritual Stuff.



There's a lot of stuff here, and it needs to come out. Everything from the X-Files to Anglo-Catholicism. It needs to go somewhere....




MESSAGE BOARD.
CHAT ROOM.
WILD LINKS AND OTHER THINGS.

Catch the kitty. Kitty likes to play!


Kitty's got a new toy! Want to come play?

Roll the dice for a random link or add your site to the random link database.

Plus my 50 best on the Net.


DisInformation
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All Right, Everybody, Let's go to Caltech!

I have always felt rather cheated that I didn't go to Caltech (California Institute of Technology). I consider it one of the world's coolest schools. So herewith, an attempt to recreate an online Caltech. This is going to be interesting....

Okay. Listings of student home pages.
The official site.

I think what I'm actually rather mad about is that a lot of people who come through this page haven't ever had a chance to get the education they've wanted. So maybe this will in some way suffice. Next up: Let's go to Yale!





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Oh well.What's this?

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ANYTHING ON THE NET IS COPYRIGHTED BY THE AUTHOR AUTOMATICALLY. WATCH IT. I COME CRUISING.


Kittycat copyright by the litterbox.

Netscape. Netscape. Netscape.




If you can't be a good example,then you'll just have to be a horrible warning.
-- Catherine Aird.



I seem to have this thing about animated GIFs.